Today I am hungry, more than normal. I tend to find a way to quench my appetite, but for some strange reason I can not today. I am finding it harder and harder to deny my attraction to women. I find them lovely, beautiful, and bewitching. Which is strange...does that mean that I am so egocentric that if I did take the time to look in the mirror that I would truly fall in love with myself?
If you have seen that video "Sober" by Pink, you may know what I mean. I dream sometime that I am making love to myself and it feels SOOOOO damn good! Then I open my eyes in my dream and it is a man, most of the time it is my beloved who is bringing me the pleasure I seek. However, I am still finding myself making love to myself. Weird, but that is just one of the dreams I have had and yet to understand. I really long to slowly undress a woman, and caress her. To smell her skin and to kiss it softly. I desire to taste the breath on her lips, and to nuzzle in her bosom as a new born child. To taste the nectar of God that gives life...it should be the most satisfying dish to enjoy. However, it is not just because she is a woman. If it were than ANY crackwhore will do, but no it is only the ones that are as I am. That love beyond boundaries, that bring forth life not only physically but mentally. The woman that truly embodies mother earth, an angel, a goddes, an evil she devil when pushed.
I can not put myself in a catergory to define my sexuality, I just love! I love freely and it is sad that I can not express it without the world caging you with negativity! I sometime long to be in a world that I precieve when I read the medieval stories of knight, nymphs, goddesses, witches, and other wonderful tales. Or in the tales of Greek gods and goddess! The funny thing is that I still love men also!
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1 comment:
Ohhh how do I understand ya here. I can not put my love and attraction into a specific category (such as straight, bi, etc) I love...simply that love. To me it never mattered who is between your legs. It was and still is always where you heart and mind are.
Those old arthurian tales have always been a dream world to me. The passion (the deception) the odd thing is to me that is more real then the shit we have now...LOL.
Nothing is wrong with ya...just embrace it instead of hiding it like 99% of the world! :)
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